Will Someone Please Explain . . . ?

One of my favorite Bible scriptures refers to being in this world, but not of it. This is sort of a blending of John 17: 14-19 and Romans 12:2. I understand that principle. I really do. I live it daily. Here are just a few of the things that perplex me about the world in which I live.

Will someone please explain to me why this character on Castle, Captain Victoria Gates insists on being called “sir?” Does she think she is given more respect with a man’s title? Does she think being called “ma’am” is degrading, insulting or somehow lower? I know, it’s a TV show, but I wonder how many women in the corporate world or our armed services make this insistence. This bothers me as do women who act insisting on being called “actors” instead of actresses.* Again, I must ask, do they think it builds them up to be referred to identically as their male counterparts? This came about during the 1970’s, I think, when women were fighting hard to get equality. I don’t see how being called by a male title would give any equality any more than replacing our panties with a jock strap would. We have beautiful words in our language devoted to us like poetess, laundress, stewardess, actress, sculptress and manageress. I found a site that actually tells the writer to avoid using these words. Why? I truly want to know. I can only speak for myself, but I don’t want to be lumped in with the men. I’ve smelled them. I’ve seen them scratch and spit. I've heard them snort and grunt. Keep me in the women’s corner, thank you very much.

Another thing, why are people so obsessed with weather reports? I have finally quit watching local news channels because they show the weather every ten minutes for about three or four minutes a shot. Between that and the commercials, there is about eight minutes of actual news. I could toss traffic reports into the mix here. News flash: Every day M-F the roads are congested during rush hour.  Every day. Another news flash: It’s winter, it’s cold. This summer it will be hot. Now, I do understand giving us warnings for tornadoes and hurricanes. That’s news. It doesn't happen every day. They are dangerous. What is interesting to me, though, is how many people ignore evacuation orders to weather hurricanes and how many people wring their hands over which coat to wear. Look outside. Is the sky gray? Take your umbrella just in case. Do you really need someone to tell you this or do you just need reassurance? Trust yourself, please.

On the subject of weather, I don’t understand why, in Minnesota, for example, the postman or post lady or postess person or whoever will deliver your mail in the worst of blizzards – whiteout conditions even. But the next day if your walk is not shoveled: no mail for you. Don’t ask them to risk life and limb walking through day-old snow. I remember taking a walk in Minnesota the day after a particularly heavy snowfall. The places that were not shoveled were easy to walk over. Where the good citizens had shoveled, it was icy and slippery. Why do we have to protect each other from Mother Nature? Isn’t that the individual’s job? Next they’ll be insisting people in Phoenix provide cooler air and shade outside their homes to help prevent heat stroke.

Here’s another for you. Stores and plastic bags. I usually carry my own canvas bags with me when I shop so I don’t have to use plastic or paper bags from the store. You’d be surprised how many cashiers try to bag the groceries in plastic then stick the plastic sacks in my canvas bag! Many stores automatically double bag things just in case it tears. Why don’t they just buy stronger bags? They are paying twice as much either way aren’t they? There was a store near my house in St Paul that would give me a bag for each item I bought, sometimes each double bagged. No kidding. But the prize goes to the good folks in Uzbekistan (whose bags tear if you look at them too hard). I was buying some bread presses from a sidewalk vendor. I selected the few I wanted and was going for money as he was going for one of his cheap sacks. “No thank you” I said (in Russian) “I’ll just carry them.” Well, this started a long exchange. No, he insisted let me bag them. I held fast as he  tried to take them out of my hands, I’ll carry them. I could tell he thought he was being nice as he pulled harder. Holding more tightly, I assured him we were parked just several steps away, we don’t need a bag. (Douglas was with me.) This went on for a couple of minutes when Doug finally said to me (in English) “Just take the bag, Laura.” No. There was a principle at stake here. Finally, after more pleading from a weary Douglas, I told the man I would take a bag if he lowered his price. Get this: he lowered his price rather than save himself the few pennies in keeping his bag. Can anyone explain this?

Here’s one I’ve been guilty of. In our society we walk on the right. It keeps things from getting too chaotic. (Imagine if we drove on the left and walked on the right, how confused we’d be.) Why is it when people who are walking through a building and come to a left turn around a corner manage to walk on the left side therefore causing a head-on collision with whoever is coming around the corner on the proper side? I have finally taught myself to turn wide. This took some time. I remember saying to myself (still do sometimes) 'stay on the right, stay on the right', like a mantra. What amuses me now is the looks I get when I’m turning right on the proper side and am rammed by one turning on the wrong side as though I have deliberately thrown myself in their path. Repeat after me: 'stay to the right, stay to the right'.

Lastly (for now), why do television programs advertise during the program. All these images that pop in and out and move around during a program are so aggravating to me. (This was supposed to be a light hearted rambling from me, now I’m getting serious. Harrumph!) I've seen the program that I am watching advertised at the same time as its airing - during it! News programs are the worst offenders. They are reporting a story while running other stories below. I have an idea. Spend less time on the cursed weather and traffic and you’d have time to report rather than scroll the more important stories below. These stories often cover up pictures they are showing that relate to the story they are actually reporting! Is anyone paying attention? Who? Who can? I’m very close to swearing off TV because of all this. Looking at it psychologically, I am (and you are) being taught to ignore what is in our periphery; unless, of course, you want to watch the commercials during your chosen program. I’m trying to be funny. I’m trying to be light. Okay, what about this: Perhaps this is further evolution of humankind. Maybe we really haven’t been using our brains to their fullest capacity. Perhaps we are actually capable of taking in all that information simultaneously. Maybe I’m just weak minded.

*I was relieved to see on the Castle website that the actress, Penny Johnson, has the title “actress” under her name.